Reality Check

CHECK YOUR RELATIONSHIP
Relationship violence is not about couples making each other mad or arguing, it’s about power and control. The following is an evaluation about your relationship. Please be honest in your responses.

   (check all that apply)
   My boyfriend/girlfriend:
o Gets very jealous.
o Makes me afraid to disagree with them.
o Follows me and/or checks up on me.
o Cuts me off from my friends and family.
o Calls me names and/or yells at me.
o Tries to control the way I dress and/or who I see.
o Makes me afraid to say no to having sex.
o Has a temper that scares me.
o Has threatened to kill me or commit suicide if I break up with them.
o Hits and breaks things when angry.

If you checked ONE of the above behaviors, and they seem to follow a pattern or occur with any kind of regularity, you may want to learn more about relationship violence. If you checked TWO or more, you may be in an unsafe and unhealthy relationship. The abuse is not your responsibility, but keeping yourself safe is.

CHECK YOURSELF
Relationship violence is not about couples making each other mad or arguing, it’s about power and control. The following is an evaluation for yourself. Please be honest in your responses.
    
   (check all that apply)
o I have an explosive temper.
o I interfere with my boyfriend/girlfriend spending time with their family or friends.
o I am very jealous.
o I feel the need to know where my boyfriend/girlfriend is all the time.
o I always call to check up on my boyfriend/girlfriend.
o I control the way my boyfriend/girlfriend dresses.
o I have threatened to hurt myself or my boyfriend/girlfriend if they said they were
   going to break up with me.
o I throw and break objects in anger.
o I become violent after drinking alcohol.
o I have insisted on having sex with my boyfriend/girlfriend even after they said no.
o I have hit, shoved, grabbed, slapped, pushed, or kicked my boyfriend/girlfriend.
If you checked ONE of the above behaviors, and they seem to follow a pattern or occur with any kind of regularity, you may want to learn more about relationship violence. If you checked TWO or more, you are behaving in a violent and abusive manner.